(no subject)

[dolorous_ett]

The only annoying thing about going to China for a month (YAY!!!) is that I'm going to miss A Dance with Dragons, and just by a couple of days. Very vexing - not that I feel Betrayed or anything silly like that, but I've been waiting for years for this, and I'm going to be spending a month dodging spoilers here. 

So, while I can still speculate as well as anyone else, I'd like to hear all your crackpot Song of Ice and Fire theories. To set the ball rolling, here are three of mine:

1. (the most controversial) Jon Snow is really, truly the bastard son of Eddard Stark and a commoner called Wylla. Why? Because Ned Stark said so, and he is truthful past the point of common sense. If Rhaegar and Lyanna Stark had issue, it's someone quite different, such as a minor character in the Night's Watch like Grenn or Satin, or perhaps Jeyne Poole.

 

2. There are too many magic horns in this story, none with really reliable provenance. Over the centuries, they have got mixed up. The Horn of Joramun really summons krakens, the kraken-summoning horn actually controls dragons and the dragon-controlling one is in fact the Horn of Joramun. Result: when the Horn of Joramun is blown nothing happens because Castle Black is landlocked and there are no sea monsters to hand. Similar non-results or chaotic results for the others. The moral is that magic isn't reliable if you want to get something really useful done.

3. "The Bear and the Maiden Fair" is a song about Ser Jorah Mormont and his inappropriate second wife.

Your thoughts?

Comments

[erised1810.livejournal.com]

oooh! eeeee! when is it coming out when is it coming out when is it not tat i even started the series yet but eh you'll never know.comign out?

[dolorous-ett.livejournal.com]

You'll love the series when you do start it! But A Dance with Dragons still isn't the last book in the series, so I can completely understand if you want to hold out until you can read the end as well as the beginning. It's certainly been a long wait.

The book comes out in the UK on July 12th - two days after I go to China!

[erised1810.livejournal.com]

I know. Iheard from others who had some kind of hysterical laughing fit once it was announced this last volume would be split into a trilogy. or something. at this point i'm starting to mix up the authors-with-ongoing-series who are still alive and the ones who passed away before the thing was done. i was thinking grrm was one of the ones who was still here though. you know, if you have any e-devices at all with you in chin i'd be glad to snapit fro mthe net somewhere and ping it your way. and now i'll duck before you put me on the scaffold for that-one...

[dolorous-ett.livejournal.com]

Last volume split into a trilogy? We've already had the second-last volume split in two - when will this madness end?

Tempting to take you up on your offer... but perhaps I should see whether a legit copy is available in Beijing first... thanks!