Another Good Fun Game
Apr. 10th, 2006 08:29 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
dolorous_ettRecently returned from the barbaric, lager-drinking South of England, and too knackered to do the travelogue I had been planning, and/or a review of the Unsatisfactory Vampire Novel (aka The Historian by Elizabeth Kostova (sp?)) which I read on the train.
So, in the meantime, here is a nice meme I gacked fromignipes:
1. Make a list of 15 characters first, and keep it to yourself for the moment. (That way you're not leading the questions asked to fit the characters.)
2. Ask your flist to post questions in the comments. For example: "4, 6, 12 & 15 are starting a band together, what is their name and what kind of music do they play? Also, who's the lead singer, and what instruments do the others play?"
3. After your flist has asked enough questions, round them up and answer them using the 15 characters you selected beforehand, and then post them.
More when I've woken up a bit.
So, in the meantime, here is a nice meme I gacked from
ignipes:1. Make a list of 15 characters first, and keep it to yourself for the moment. (That way you're not leading the questions asked to fit the characters.)
2. Ask your flist to post questions in the comments. For example: "4, 6, 12 & 15 are starting a band together, what is their name and what kind of music do they play? Also, who's the lead singer, and what instruments do the others play?"
3. After your flist has asked enough questions, round them up and answer them using the 15 characters you selected beforehand, and then post them.
More when I've woken up a bit.
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Date: 2006-04-10 08:11 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-04-12 05:00 pm (UTC)Filch bitches non-stop about Hagrid's leniency, soppiness, general fondness for living things (including students) and lack of enthusiam for corporal punishment. However, what comes over most strongly from the journal is his burning envy of Hagrid for his fine head of hair and bristling beard. There's also a great deal about Mrs Norris, including her origins. It turns out that she was originally Hagrid's kitten - Filch confiscated her, and later told Hagrid that he had drowned his kitten, when in fact he raised Mrs Norris as his own.
Kreacher tells "the nasty Mudblood" about Mrs Norris, as part of his long-running campaign to drive a wedge between the domestic staff of the castle. However, his plan backfires horribly, as Hagrid is so delighted to see his old kitten that he forgives Filch on the spot. In fact, he realises that he's underestimated him all these years, and determines to be his good friend from now on. Filch is pretty freaked out by this, but not as far as to burst into tears, though he whinges constantly about Hagrid to Mrs Norris.
As for Kreacher, Hermione has put him in compulsory rafia-work classes, in an effort to retrain him as a useful member of society. Harry and Ron are keeping a book on how long it's going to last.
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Date: 2006-04-12 05:51 pm (UTC)As for Kreacher, Hermione has put him in compulsory rafia-work classes, in an effort to retrain him as a useful member of society. Harry and Ron are keeping a book on how long it's going to last.
*laughs* I can so see that happening.
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Date: 2006-04-10 08:42 pm (UTC)Question the second #7 and #8 want to play a funny prank on #9, involving (among other things) a jobberknoll, twelve pairs of dirty gym socks, and a golden tweezer. How do they lure #9 to the spot marked 'X'?
Question the third Some very scandalous photographs surface, showing #13 and #2 in compromising (albeit very gymnastic) positions in a dark motel room in Kansas. What excuse does each make for being there?
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Date: 2006-04-12 05:16 pm (UTC)Draco Malfoy of course. He laughed so hard that he wet himself, secure in the knowledge that Goyle would stop Crabbe from killing him, especially as Crabbe wasn't walking very well. Crabbe's fine now, though he had to spend a week in the hospital wing, and dropped Herbology the day he got out.
Given that these two are both severely lacking in the sense of humour department, it's just as well that Dennis is such a very biddable boy. He followed Kreacher to the approximate location of X ("Oooo, is that a real House Elf? Cool!"). Then Trelawney told him that her Inner Eye said a vision would be vouchsafed to the next person to stand on the spot marked X - and Dennis positively pushed her out of the way in order to stand on it. Dennis is a nice boy, so you'll be glad to hear that he wasn't too upset at having a practical joke played on him - just stood there while all those strange things rained down around him, saying "Brilliant!"
Rita said it was "research". Ron went scarlet, and muttered something about how he thought it was Lavender. When Lavender heard about it she dumped him on the spot - the true reason for their split. Hermione, who has always had a soft spot for Ron, believes that he had hired Rita to provide a reason for Lavender to dump him, like the old divorce cases in the early 20th century. No-one quite has the heart to disabuse her of this, especially as she and Ron are now getting on so well.
Luna, who has a knack of asking awkward questions, once asked Ron what he was doing in America. He muttered something about how he thought "the earth moved" and hurried away.
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Date: 2006-04-10 08:51 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-04-12 05:25 pm (UTC)Wow... if ever a conspiracy held within it the seeds of its own destruction, this would be it!
They are plotting to get rid of Professor Binns. Narcissa and Hermione want to replace him with someone who teaches according to their (wildly different) versions of Wizarding history. Hagrid just thinks history is boring.
This conspiracy would never have got anywhere. As soon as Ginny made clear in a few well-chosen words what a daft idea it was, they all gave up in disgust.
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Date: 2006-04-13 04:21 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-04-10 09:08 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-04-12 05:29 pm (UTC)Dear god. I think I need to go and bleach my brain.
Neither, in truth. Crabbe was a deeply unhappy young man at Hogwarts, and just wanted to be held.
Hagrid would try very hard to be non-judgemental about it, and he'd make quite a good job of keeping a straight face at the time, but would run off back to his hut as soon as possible, where he and Fang would laugh themselves silly about it.
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Date: 2006-04-10 09:17 pm (UTC)1 desperately wants to be 7, to the point of setting up a false livejournal in 7's name and greedily soliciting 7's actual f-list. Surprisingly, 7 doesn't care - why?
8, wandering perilously close to the movie screen whilst looking for the exit at the cinema, accidentally gets stuck IN the movie - and 8 was sick of it before! Fortunately, 8's mobile still works. 8 calls on 5 for help, but 5 doesn't answer because...
12 pretends to feel nothing but happiness for 15's latest accomplishment, but secretly is incensed to the point of death & destruction. 12 starts looking for something that will one-up 15 once and for all. What happens when 2 surprises 12's secret?
13 stumbles upon 14's search history when borrowing 14's computer. 14 has been looking up some very strange stuff lately. What is it, and what is the very first thing 13 thinks?
Only two this time - might come back.
Date: 2006-04-12 05:38 pm (UTC)He doesn't care because he's resolutely ignoring the issue. If he found out about the existence of the Internet he'd never be able to live with himself. If his old Mistress was still alive he'd have been beheaded on the spot if she caught him so much as thinking about such a nasty Muggle thing.
Hermione is, of course, stealing his identity to crusade for house-elf rights. So if he ever does get internet-savvy he's in for the most dreadful shock...
... Hedwig is an owl, and can't work the phone. Look like poor Sybill is stuck forever in "The Matrix" for the duration...
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Date: 2006-04-13 01:32 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-04-10 09:19 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-04-12 05:45 pm (UTC)Hedwig does attempt to tell Ron - first through a series of those odd shrieks snowy owls like to make, then by nipping his sleeve in her beak and attempting to drag him towards the scene of crime... but for some unaccountable reason Ron doesn't catch on.
Being a bird of prey, Hedwig then attempts to eat the greyhound. She is cuffed around the head and sent back to Harry in disgrace. Fortunately, he and Hedwig are much more on the same wavelength, and he makes a small fortune betting against Ron's dog. Hedgwig gets a raw steak and a big cuddle from Harry. So all's well that ends well.
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Date: 2006-04-10 10:01 pm (UTC)And does 6 and 15 kiss each other in a rose-garden ?
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Date: 2006-04-12 05:52 pm (UTC)I'd quite like it if they did - good Snape/Hermione fics are one of my private fandom vices. Though I can't see it the way canon's shaping up - or even in my "House of Flying Artichokes" universe, where he at least would rather have liked to...
Ooooh, I hope so!
Poor Crabbe could do with a bit of loving, and I can well imagine that Narcissa's sick of Lucius, his endless preening and his utter ineptitude at Evil Plots. In fact, now I come to think of it, I can well believe she's about ready for some New Blood... and it would be one in the eye for little Draco as well, which is good news too...
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Date: 2006-04-13 05:05 am (UTC)I actually ended up making het-pairs of which neither really squicks me ! Infact, both pairings are rather sweet. *pets both pairs*
You know, there must be something in this numerology business … curious, isn't it ? You see, without your list to actually refer to, as you hadn't revealed it at the time, I was actually thinking of 4 people there with bddays on 1st and 10th April and 6th and 15th July … Incredibly strangely surprising outcome … don't you think ?
Narcissa could well be thoroughly irritated with Lucius' inability to protect her and her son adequately (and attending too much to his posing and dressing-up --- God, that man pretties himself up too much !) and go for someone with lots of muscle and not much brains or much magic --- after all, she can very well provide the brains and magical ability of the partnership !
I could show you pics of the people I was thinking of … shall I ?
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Date: 2006-04-13 09:55 am (UTC)I must admit I've never thought seriously about Narcissa/Crabbe before now... must admit it has a certain je ne sais quoi... And you don't have to be a genius or even particularly nice to get tired of that preening twit Lucius, methinks... *beats off plot bunnies with a stick*
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Date: 2006-04-14 10:40 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-04-13 04:30 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-04-14 04:54 pm (UTC)Also, as you say, canon was not kind to that ship.
But for now, while I sort out what's what in my mind, try "Letter from an Exile One Merciful Morning" by Textualsphinx - http://www.fictionalley.org/authors/textualsphinx/LFEOMM01a.html
It's really old, and not canon-compliant, but it's my the first SS/HG fic I read, and I still think it stands up pretty well. Especially the second half, where all the staff start commenting on the business.
It's a one-shot, the aftermath of the victory against Voldemort. Snape has been sacked for inappropriate contact with a student. This story consists of a letter to Hermione from him, which an angry and jealous Ron intercepts and insists on reading out for the edification of all.
Give it a try, anyway. It's hard to rec fics at the best of times, as I don't know what sort of story you generally read.
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Date: 2006-04-10 10:21 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-04-12 06:03 pm (UTC)A good question. I'm glad you asked me that (though I can't guarantee to keep track of all the bits - it's pretty complicated...)
Ginny has been terrified of turnips, since Luna Lovegood told her about the Fearsome Demon of Neeps (the god all turnips worship), and the terrible revenge he exacts on all who harm his loyal servants when they were both small.
Umbridge thinks it's connected because she thinks everything is part of a giant conspiracy.
It's nothing of the kind, of course. Dennis was trying to report Vincent Crabbe for violently snogging a middle-aged blonde woman in the middle of the staff-only rose garden, and Flich refused to believe a word of it, then clapped Dennis in detention for being in the staff-only rose garden in the first place.
Ron, Kreacher and Hagrid were listening in because... well, wouldn't you?
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Date: 2006-04-12 10:38 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-04-11 08:00 am (UTC)MM
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Date: 2006-04-12 06:05 pm (UTC)Some honey and plenty of money wrapped up in a five-pound note.
And pistols - for use on each other at dawn. I honestly can't see those to collaborating on anything, at any time. Sorry.
Especially as Hermione is Anti Blood Sports.
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Date: 2006-04-12 09:31 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-04-13 11:32 am (UTC)See Lust Over Pendle by
Although I agree with you, if you go strictly by canon as it stands there's no way these two would co-operate on anything except mutual obliteration.
What a weird coincidence.
MM
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Date: 2006-04-13 02:18 pm (UTC)AJ Hall can make any character do anything, and make it work. But even she needed about 200 pages of backstory to get Hermione and Narcissa on the same side...
I can't remember any edged weapons in LOP - but I think there were springer spaniels involved...
Anyway, you're right of course, never say never. If I think of a plausible way to get those two hunting Snarks together, I'll repost.
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Date: 2006-04-11 09:03 am (UTC)Also, on the flimsy basis that it is a vampire novel, I had considered reading The Historian . What’s wrong with it?
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Date: 2006-04-12 06:10 pm (UTC)Hmmmm... tricky one, this. It's hard to imagine Rita Skeeter failing to tell anyone anything, at any time. The only possible reason is that she was either locked in a glass jar, or just possibly otherwise occupied with Ron at the time (see above).
Why was Umbridge plotting against Trelawney? Because when Trelawney told her she was going to meet at a tall, dark, handsome stranger, she neglected to mention that his name was Bane...
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Date: 2006-04-12 06:32 pm (UTC)Am considering whether to answer that question here or to do a whole post on it.
If I had to sum it up in one sentence, it's because although it sounds good in outline it's flat and dull, and it's hard to care if any of the characters live or die. And considering how big the book is, not a fat lot happens. (two sentences now - whoops, sorry)
sorry - reposted with link
Date: 2006-04-16 11:29 am (UTC)Ask, and you shall receive...
http://dolorous-ett.livejournal.com/38907.html
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Date: 2006-04-13 03:05 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-04-13 07:03 am (UTC)The seconds are out, they stand facing each other across the carpet/stage thingy, wands out...
Then Snape throws up his hands in disgust - "Take her, idiot boy, if it means so much to you. I am an Anguished Man of Mystery, and domestic ties would only cramp my style... Oh, and you're holding that wand wrong."
He storms out in disgust. Crabbe wins by default. Crabbe is suspended for Conduct Unbecoming in a Student, but Umbridge gives him a job in the ministry as her tea-boy. Poor Crabbe! But for the outcome of the war, things would have gone very badly for him... He was one of the first Slytherins to enlist for front-line combat against the Dark Lord.
Umbridge is secretly very flattered that two men are actually duelling for her affections. However, at the time she confines herself to standing on the sidelines saying "Hem hem! Duelling is not allowed in the corridors!"