dolorous_ett | InteriorDecoratingGod!Snape II (Reply)

Further to a very interesting discussion with lareinenoire and hannahmarder in a previous thread about InteriorDecoratingGod!Snape, I found a little jem in rowen_r 's journal that I just had to pass on. It's only tangentially relevant, but it's so clever and funny that it deserves all the exposure it can get - and it is by way of another demonstration of the importance of Snape's mystic connection with home furnishings.

For those of you who think you aren't familiar with InteriorDecoratingGod!Snape, if you've read more than a couple of Snape/Hermione romances you will certainly have encountered him. There's a common set-piece when the love-interest enters Snape's private quarters for the first time and is favourably impressed by what she finds (it is usually she - though I daresay slash authors do just the same thing). The writer than takes a good few hundred years to lech his accommodation and its decor, swooning at the ancient oak panneling with that special patina that only comes with years of hard polishing; the strategically placed easy chairs that are surprisingly comfortable; the roaring open fire that makes the room delightfully cosy and throws delightfully sinister flickering shadows into dark corners; the fascinating selection of artfully chosen books that throw the most flattering insights into his character; the tasteful collection of ornaments that are sparse and somehow masculine; the exquisitely textured hangings, curtains, bed-curtains (if it's going to be that sort of fic) and rugs, which are sometimes not even green....
Well, you get the picture. Curb your excitement. It's usually a dead giveaway to the author's age as well - teenagers don't generally feel the urge to slobber over home furnishings or real estate...

Anyway, we don't get to squeee over the contents of Snape's digs in this play, but without his connection to articles of furniture, the whole thing would fall apart.

Click here to read a drama about Voldemort's fall - in iambic pentameters